Selfie Scrapbook

'Selfie trend is getting a bit sinister'

-The Telegraph, March 2014

This outfit post has been evolving for a while. I had the dreaded Storage Full thing on my phone so went about deleting everything surplus to requirement from my handheld. I embarked on a journey through my photographs and initially I happened upon a variety of selfies (body not face - nothing worth hacking into my iCloud for) taken in the loos of St John - sounds a bit grotty but they just so happen to be the whitest, cleanest WCs in London and have the best mirror for a full body outfit shot. So this post started as 'St John Selfies' throughout the year. But I only found about four which maybe was not enough to keep anyone interested. Coming across another series of photographs taken in three different musical venues over the summer, therefore three different sets of clothes, I thought this post could be called something reeeally imaginative like 'Gigs - What I Wore'. The variety of artists being Paloma Faith at The Roundhouse, Jonathan Wilson at Village Underground and One Direction at Wembley. One evening of lipstick and saxophones followed by beards, harmonicas and patchouli, finishing off with screaming, sherbet and cherry chap-sticks but blog-post wise I still wasn't feeling enthused. And then I wore boring things to the Paloma gig so that plan was scuppered. 

It shortly afterwards became a post about my mini trip to the States. A bit of a 'Miami Vice' vibe but I wasn't very committed to the idea and sort of ended  up just wearing  a bikini and floaty things and taking a few snaps that I thought were good to go. That was until my friend and I lay on sun loungers next to supermodel Erin Wasson for an afternoon and I ended up deleting all my photographs and vowing to only eat broccoli and smoke cigarettes for the rest of my life. 

Then just before I decided that it would be a full on shameless selfie post I was pouring over the weekend papers and read that Kim Kardashian is bringing out a book called 'Selfish' entirely of her and her bottom. It also reported that obsessive selfie-taking is now a recognised mental disorder. Argh! Quick! Delete!  But then it seemed like such a waste. So before I consign most of these shots to the trash and free up some storage space - here are some of the clothes I have worn around the town, things I've tried on, things I've been given and things I can't wait to wear. There's no common theme except for the fact they're nearly all of me and lots have been taken in bathrooms around the world. A selfie-scrapbook if you will. I hope it doesn't make you feel the need to suggest I urgently require a stint in the Priory sans phone and mirrors. 

THINGS I'VE WORN

First St. John Selfie. You may have seen this one before.

Loos of LouLous

My favourite Cedric Charlier bag which is having a moment again

Close up of my dress from Lime Green Bow. 

Bathroom up The Shard. If you look carefully you'll see this is also a 'Belfie'.*

Close up of my Zimmerman Splatter Dress

Me wearing a sink and some tiles in Polpo

St John Selfie #2

We went to a Caribbean music night in Miami.

The pale pink bathrooms of Soho Beach House. Another favourite Zimmerman dress
which matched the interiors.

Boring outfit for Paloma.

St. John - last one. In my new favourite Zara dress which will see me
through these weird weather days.

THINGS I TRIED ON (and MAYBE bought)

I was nearly sold on this Kate Moss for Topshop dress until I saw LiLo
falling out of a club in it.

Obsessed with this Bonwitt Teller silk dress at Lime Green Bow. See it here.

Favourite handbag. Apart from the fact I can only fit some earphones in it. 

Another wonderful handmade thing found in the charity shop on Notting Hill
Gate. It looks like a night sky.

Kenneth Jay Lane Ring from eBay

Victor Costa pale pink origami dress. Also from Lime Green Bow.
I am in love with this dress.
More on it soon.

Chanello

GIFTS THAT WERE GIVEN (from people who clearly know me very well!)

Lucky me! A birthday gift. Viennese gem from a flea market. Emerald green is my
favourite colour. And my adored Amethyst ring from best friends.

Lucky me again! Favourite birthday gift. I had been dreaming about owning this. My dream came true!
The most beautiful gold Bluebell pendant by Catherine Zoraida. 

Christmas present from my sister...VIP ONE DIRECTION tickets at Wembley! Hurray!
Up there with one of the best nights of my life. Dress from Topshop. 

One Direction gave us a watch! With their signatures on the back. Yes!

I actually wear the watch...with my LLBean Tote.

Things I will be wearing

ASOS Salon dress.

I was going to show you this on the next post but I got too excited.
My magical Portobello blanket coat. More on this next time.

Topshop. Too good.

*Handy Glossary

Helfie: a selfie of hair

Belfie: a selfie of the derriere

Welfie: a work out selfie 

Drelfie: a drunken selfie

Shelfie: a selfie of your bookshelf

Tweet Pin It Now!

Selfies...You're So Vain

"I loathe narcissism, but I approve of vanity." - Diana Vreeland

So in other news this week...the words 'Twerking', 'Vom' (my favourite) and 'Selfie'  have made it into the Oxford English Dictionary. I had to just Google Twerking to understand what the hell that is (Miley Cyrus' raunchy dance moves at the VMAs apparently?) and well, Selfie is a word borne from an egomaniac generation of narcissistic iPhone users. A few days ago, while having a mani pedi on my lunch break (yah!) I watched a girl parked in a van outside the nail bar spend half an hour taking pictures of herself from above, below, round the side...about 27 snaps later, each with a different shade of pout, she finally settled for the perfect pose. Maybe for a boyfriend (lucky chap!), maybe to stick on Instagram, Twitter, Facey or Tinder (my ultimate favourite!)...I just sat there with my hands under a grill and thought WHAT A LOSER! And hummed Carly Simon to myself...tralalaaaa.

I woke up yesterday morning thinking I had lost my phone. In my Aperol induced haze I lay in bed lamenting the photos I had taken in the last year and phone numbers of people who I would have no way of contacting ever again. After twenty mins of winding myself up and feeling like it was the end of the world, I rolled out of bed and realised that in fact the phone was actually on the floor and I just hadn't put it on to charge. Phewee. You don't know what you've got til it's gone I reckon so I spent the afternoon appreciating my phone, flicking through all of my long forgotten photos, digging into the darkest depths of old albums, reminiscing about happier times and then I realised...I AM A SELFIE TAKER! I remember thinking that if I were going to start blogging about what I wore then I had better document it properly. The thing is, they're all rubbish. I absolutely haven't perfected it and then it dawned on me the chick in the van had it about right...I would need on average 27 (or more) goes to get the perfect pose. I give up after about two, mainly due to time constraints and actually, boredom. Or in one case nearly garotting myself on a loo roll holder in the Pizza Express lavatories. It's embarrassing to explain why you've taken so long in the bathroom when you've innocently just been trying to make your arms look rexi while half smiling. You can't say "Oh I've been doing Selfies in the bog!"

Anyway, as an apology to the poor, judged van girl I am showing you my hashtag Selfies which I never thought would see the light of day. So here they are...me being vain and self-involved in various locations and WCs all over London. Knock yourself out!

Took this one to show a friend a dress (which turned out to be a brilliant purchase from Topshop here) I had been forced to buy because I had sat in tramps pee on a bus and needed something else to wear. Truly. It looks like I'm smiling but I was actually crying.

(I blogged these glorious Poplin PJs once before here )

Favourite ASOS ring - I think they do the best costume jewellery.

ASOS Jewel Print Dress and Clutch

Foot Selfie. Waiting for my close up in the Borders General Hospital.

Evil Eye from House of Harlow but you can get amazing EE stuff from Baublebar which has lovely things.

Another Topshop dress, Anya Hindmarch clutch and Christian Louboutins at St. John.

Best rezza in London I reckon. Cleanest loos.

You can't see it but I am wearing this Zara dress which is my new favourite thing.

Me and my Anya Hindmarch Huxley. I know, I can't see it either.

Me in the office today. Bye then!

I will endeavour to do MUCH better next time. Any Selfie tips are most welcome from you all. Unless your name is Miley Cyrus.

Tweet Pin It Now!